Friday, March 28, 2008

springtime snowfall

it is snowing. just when the cherry blossoms in the back yard were about to burst.

i am in love with the world.

my cat has snowflakes covering his fur. he looks like a bobcat in the montana wilderness. but....the dumb pansy version.

i didn't think it was possible, but i have maxed out on cake. i can't eat anymore. at least not today.

i am about to venture out in spring storm 2008. luckily, i am armed with a subaru and rainboots. nothing can harm me.

i went out last night with a friend...and after a few drinks....we decided to cut my hair. this is not a good idea.

i am in love with soko. she is the cutest thing since baby otters. in a contest between soko and kitten paw would be close....but i think soko would win. be the judge:

kitten paw pad:


and to seal the deal:

i talked about her before....and posted a different song here

Monday, March 17, 2008

corned beef and poop

i have freckles but i am not Irish. i wish i was. but i am Scandinavian mutt. i do, however, like Guinness, Jameson, Oscar Wilde, potatoes, fog and corned beef.

i made 8 lbs of corned beef yesterday. this is my new Irish diet: i plan to eat corned beef hash for breakfast, Reuben's for lunch, and a sensible dinner (and by sensible i mean a Guinness or three).

but i do not get the cabbage. i searched and searched for a recipe for something other than boring cabbage....i found one that sounded promising because it involved two of my favorite things: bacon and beer. i don't know how something like cabbage can ruin these two pillars of fantastic, but it did. the result was nasty, mushy, and bitter.

there is this place in missoula that has the best reubens and sweet potato fries called the hobnob. i fantasize about this place. they have this special sauce (my guess is mayo and dijon) that i want to rub all over my body.

i talk a lot about food.

Friday, March 14, 2008

take my teeth, i don't need them anyway.

i woke up at 2:58 am in excruciating, blinding pain. i have another tooth that needs a root canal. it feels like a red hot screwdriver is being shoved through my tooth and into my skull.
if i could remove all my teeth and have dentures i would. i hate teeth. i fucking HATE teeth.

thank god i had a vicodin left over from the last root canal or i might have died.

oh, and the next available appointment is next friday. i have a week.

if anyone has a pair of pliers and a bottle of bourbon, i will pay you 100 dollars to remove the problem.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

home, sweet project filled home.

i have transformed our home. it used to be a cluttered mess with potential. it is spacious and clean. we now have a den. so exciting! the den used to be a room full of boxes and bags of clothes for the good will. it was a the definition of "wasted space" and now it is the definition of RAD. and the living room used to be cute and cozy....and now it is cute and spacious. like, you can breathe in it. or sit and read a book.

other ongoing project: the back deck. this used to be covered with astro turf. yes. ASTROTURF. it is now in a heap in the alley. the wood underneath looks great. by summer, this will be the place to be. did i mention we have a soft serve machine? yeah. uh huh.

next project: i will conquer the bedroom. it will be mine. i need to get rid of 80% of my clothes. i wear the same three outfits in rotation so really....i don't need the amount of clothes that i have....even if they are pretty and i love them. then, after the heap is gone, i will organize the dresser and closet. THEN i am going to paint! this is so exciting! and get new bedding!

this is what people with no jobs get excited about.

i also get excited about what to make for dinner, the new Domino magazine, laundry, our raccoons, and how much coffee i can drink in one day. and wearing slips, slippers and sweaters all day.

we have two resident raccoons. they have names. Phil is young and curious. he is a little timid. he likes to climb the tree in the back yard. His sleep cycle is off because he hangs out during daylight hours. This might be due to day light savings. Scar is older and i think female. she has either been tortured my humans or run over by a car. she is missing half her tail and has a huge hairless patch on her back from a previous wound. she is a bit mangled, not afraid of anything, and well fed. Scar, picks up a morsel of cat food with her cute little paw, dips in in water and places it in her mouth. she eats formally. she has incredible manners. her visiting hours are from 9-10 pm.

i went from fearing them and making it my mission to scare them away forever by throwing things, charging and screaming, to loving them, naming them, and buying extra cat food for them. charlie, our retarded cat, seems indifferent to them. they live together in harmony, even though everyone tells me that raccoons kill cats. charlie is stupid. i am sure the raccoons are aware of this and pity him.