Tuesday, October 30, 2007

important update

i went back to the salon and now i have super duper blond hair! yeehaw! i look like children of the corn....you know, but in a good way. i should think of a better visual...

Monday, October 29, 2007

these boots are made for...

i got my hair colored again. it looks exactly the same and cost 100 bucks. i am so tired of this. it makes me want to do something drastic like dye it hot pink or purple. or black again. or something. why spend 100 bucks for a couple of highlights? i said "platinum. chunky. bright. dramatic" i did not say "subtle. natural". i will put before and after pics up to show what i am talking about. i just need to find my camera.

i found the perfect blue cowboy boots for my halloween costume at red light. i walked through a crowd of girls dressed like the typical "slutty-girl" all looking at each others tits and booty's...all asking the same question "am i too fat?" and all answering the same "oh my god, no! you look soooo soooo cute"!....i yawned and looked to the shoe shelf and the boots shined like the blue skies of heaven.

they are so rad. so hideous and perfect. so ugly and amazing. i keep wearing them....you know, as a joke..but a joke that totally works with leggings and a skirt in that so-ugly-that-it's-trendy way.

i am four pounds from my ideal weight and as i approach this i think my ideal weight should be 10 lbs less than my previous ideal weight.

would it me inappropriate to put a pic of my ass on here? i know, i know, the internet is no place for nudity. i just have a great pic that i feel like should be shared with the world (and by world i mean the two people that read this...holla "s" and "a"!)

i made an apple cake with caramel frosting yesterday and it sucked. more on this on my baking blog to come.

i am having a bad face day. i must have slept on my face funny.

so i watched rosemary's baby. and i really hated it. why are there so many movies about woman being impregnated by aliens/flies/satan? it really bothers me. and mia farrow really pissed me off. i wanted to shake her. and smack her around. she was so stupid. (dan and i have an argument about whether or not her character is a parody of "stupid naive woman" or not...or if that is just what she was).
the only thing i liked about her was her haircut.

i went to bladerunner at the cinerama. it was fantastic, of course.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

mtv and the loss of soul

i am really sad that the photobooth on my laptop no longer works. if it was working i would take a pic and put it here to show what it looks like when you bite through the tip of your tongue. i caught an elbow to the jaw....and now i have a mangled tongue. luckily, the mouth heals quickly. i would also take a pic of my new haircut to show how much i look like sienna miller.

have you seen the new show on mtv with tila tequila? holy shit. holy holy holy shit. it made my soul hurt. i felt totally nauseous while watching it. are people really like this? i am so disturbed by this show...and i can't look away. so....she is bi.....she "is looking for love" (cough...bullshit) and has a house with a group of dudes and a group of lesbians all fighting for her...um...love? anyway, they ALL SHARE A BED. this is so creepy and wrong and awesome. and of course there are cameras capturing every angle of the bed. the lesbians are pretty hot....slutty...femme.....nice tits....etc....the dudes on the other hand are so disgusting. gross. not one normal one. not one even half way good looking...(what does this say about men?) in the first episode, a stupid hick and an obnoxious black dude keep brawling (if you can call it that..it is really quite pathetic). this upsets tila and she starts to tear up because she just announced (for the first time?...um....ok...) that she is bi....and she is very vulnerable (poor, poor bisexual) so...one of the lesbian is "comforting" her by licking the inside of her mouth. when they are done kissing, tila wipes away a tear, looks at the girl and says "you are so pretty" in this weird canned hollow i-can't-wait-to-fuck-you voice. like, exactly what the maid says to the rich woman in a bad porn right before she gets on her knees, lifts her fancy dress, and licks her pussy. this is the first episode. i can not wait to see the rest of this show.

i made meatloaf. with this great tomato relish. so good. i am queen of the kitchen.

oh, also....i have lost 3 more pounds. so, that means i have lost 5 lbs this week. so i only need to lose 5 more in the next two weeks. so far the only thing i do to lose weight is stop drinking and stop eating dessert every night. i wonder what would happen if i actually worked out and ate salad with lean protein. i mean, aside from being totally miserable and hungry...i would be so fucking thin.

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

i heart sienna

i am getting my hair cut today....but i am still growing it out. i know this makes little sense. it needs "shaping "(ie removal of puffiness)

these are some inspiration pics. my hair is not that far off...but i need a little more length on the top....wow....i look just like sienna miller. it is uncanny. really. for realz.

i think the one of whats-her-name is a little long for me....but i still like it. and i like her boobs. but that is neither here nor there.


i tried on my bikini to get myself mentally prepared for hawaii.
i see now why people work out. (as if i didn't have enough of an idea)
i think my body is aging and i am not happy about this. the cute laugh lines on my face are nice...i don't mind the creases around my eyes....i like that part...but holy shit i was not expecting my booty to take a hit. i mean, don't get me wrong, it still looks nice, but not like it did a couple years ago. scary stuff. speaking of....

now added to the list of scary movies i have watched this week:


firstly, disturbia with shia labeouf is fun and forgettable. i do have a mini crush on shia...which was the only thing that made this worth watching. i almost didn't include it in the list because i have a hard time calling it "scary". it is more of a thriller. a thriller with a cute yet awkward boy that (of course) gets the totally hot neighbor chick while solving a murder/mystery. he does this role so well....i can see why he is sticking to it. shia, it is totally working for me. please don't stop.
p.s the car crash scene in the beginning is very well done. i was impressed and normally anything with cars or crashing bores me to tears. except, of course, if those cars transform into robots (again, shia...thank you...i want to take that innocent dorky face of yours and shove it in my lap)

alien and aliens: i squirmed and flailed a bit. er, ok ok....at one point during aliens i pulled my hoodie over my head to protect me....and the zipper caught my eyebrow. ah hem. so now i have this scrape over my right eye. battle wound. ya dig?

man, i am a loser.

Saturday, October 13, 2007

oh, life.

this day sucked.


other news:

black nail polish is great. it looks sexy and kind of evil. and oh so very halloween.

vicodin is my friend again. thank god.

i cleaned my bedroom. it was like conquering a small rebellious third world country.

blueberry pancakes are delicious. weekends rule. i stayed in my pjs all day today.

not sure what to do with the rest of my life. i kind of want to run away (i get this every so often) to mexico or hawaii or paris or amsterdam.

Thursday, October 11, 2007

'' ''

smoothed out the creases
my scars have faded
you're all edges
still serrated

i forgot all the lyrics
each line erased
the blood dried
but i remember the taste

fire and stakes
a fight for two
shove it deep in your chest
the only zombie was you

giving birth to fly larva

it is october...also known as "scary movie month".

here is what i have watched so far:

-the hand that rocks the cradle
-the ring
-the fly

i wish this list was cooler...

if i was pregnant with a half fly baby...i would totes abort that shit. why geena davis, why? how is it possible that there is a fly 2? for fucks sake, after you blow the head off of the fly that impregnated you, throw yourself down some stairs....or at least drink some bleach. cmon.

anyway. october is also a nice time to drink chai and walk around. i keep doing this.
and it is a delightful time to eat squash, yams, and homemade soup. oh and apples. dude.
i am really good at making homemade applesauce. for realz.

i have been reading too much martha stewart living.

i can't wait to wear my puffy coat. it isn't cold enough yet. i love that thing. i think i wore it everyday from last january through april. it is so cozy. i keep staring at it. i want to have sex with it. is that weird?

i have lost three pounds.

only 20 more to go.
just kidding.

only 7 more to go...see...now that seems possible. kind of. i just need to hold on to will power.

i wish i had some cake.


Wednesday, October 3, 2007

packing is lame.

here is why packing sucks:

i decide my outfits in a chronological-what-is-closes-to-top-of-giant-clothing-heap method. otherwise known as the let-the-clothing-monster-decide method. this is fairly mindless and seems to work for me. i don't think my clothes necessarily look like they were in a pile and randomly layered onto my body with little thought. the wrinkles might give it away...or are wrinkles in now? fuck, i hope so. cuz then i am totes in.

anyway...packing sucks because i actually have to think about outfits and what i will wear each day and what goes with what and weather forecasts and shit. i am bad at this. i think i just packed 5 pairs of pants and one t-shirt.

my ideal packing method is this: wear one outfit the entire trip and bring no luggage. if i need clean undies, etc, i will buy them as needed and return home with plastic bag.

p.s i am writing a blog about packing instead of packing. this is procrastination at its finest.

crazies are invading and other news.

i never want house guests again. more on this later. i am still trying to calm myself down from the chaos.

i have started a diet.

i am growing my hair out and it is a fluffy and painful process.

one month until hawaii.

i am flying to nevada tomorrow. i am indifferent about this.

see the movie Eastern Promises just for the naked fight scene. it is amazing.

i need a massage.

i had another lesbian dream last night. i think i am a lesbian. (not really, but wouldn't that be great?)

i got new jeans and they make me look like a 1970's porn star. i love them.

i hate addicts. especially when they are in my home. (hate is a strong word. i am aware of this. also, you can be addicted to pot. only stupid fucking stoners disagree with this)

i am in love with the weather. Autumn makes me feel like me.

Monday, October 1, 2007

autumn chill

city of mulch and moss
wrapped in fog
and a wool scarf
the trees bleed
colors drip like honey
onto sloppy soggy streets

frozen noses
red like apples
cinnamon lips

we would freeze without each other