Monday, January 5, 2009

2009. it will be better. won't be too hard to do.

oh hi.

so here i am, at my parents house...brushing a dying cat.

it won't be long now. i keep telling him all about the catnip and perfect frolicking meadows he is about to pounce to. or at least the end of his suffering.

how is that for uplifting? don't worry, i have more.

here is to the end of 2008!

let me be the last to say it...."eff you 2008"
(i know i am late with this blog...due to.....well, every bad thing possible that has kept me in hibernation for the past couple weeks)

here is why i hate you, 2008:

really? my dad with kidney cancer? eff you.
um...remember gas prices? total effing dumb.
sibling wars and family division. effing awesome.
the economy and how everyone i know seems to be going broke. rad.
my he hasn't gone through enough. why not add on more pain. eff you.
don't worry i saved the best for last...
a miscarriage. in a snowstorm. before christmas.
i hate snow. i hate ballard. i hate driving in seattle if it snows. i hate everything.

i have a lot of anger at the moment.

so. 2009. bring it.
i have a couple of hopes...

my dad will stay cancer free
i will get pregnant again and stay that way for 9 months (hopefully with less nausea than last time...)
my lovely sister-in-law, shelly, will also have a healthy pregnancy
obama will make me proud
hawaii in february

i know all this seems personal. and it is. but, hey.....welcome to my blog.

now on to happier thoughts....because i need to focus:

i LOVE my husband. so much. like a huge weight of love on my chest. like i can't breath because of this love crushing me. like i am floating in love. it is a feather. it is the softest love. the sharpest love. it holds on so tight and sets me free.

(i know, gushy and so gross)

puppy!!! what a difference a puppy makes. she is the best distraction....and the timing was perfect. i needed her. meet coco chanel:

riley is my little shining star......sure, she is completely difficult and argumentative and feircly independent.....but she is also so sweet. and tough as nails. and i am so proud of her.

i read all four Twilight books in 5 days.

i actually had a conversation with an 11 year old girl about how great Twilight is. i am not kidding. dan walked over and whispered in my ear "you are talking about Twilight"....this of course snapped me out of it.

everyone should be worried about me. i might dress up and go see the movie. i am coming unglued.

ok bye.


Erin said...

Oh, Dana. How deeply sorry I am. I can't even begin to imagine how sad you must feel. I'm keeping you in my thoughts for a much happier 2009, and I have no doubt a happy, healthy pregnancy is just around the corner.

What a sweet dog Coco Chanel is! No doubt she was meant just for you, Dan, and Riley.

Much love.

splendid said...

leather handbags